Making Peace with Uncertainty

Anabelle Malcolm
Luke 9:1–6

I’m a military spouse, and in general, I really enjoy this lifestyle. But in my opinion, the worst part of military life is the uncertainty. I’m the kind of person who really wants to know what’s going to happen. But as I’ve found out, the military doesn’t operate on certainty.

There were lots of unknowns when Mark prepared to start active-duty in 2005: How long will this military thing last? Where are we moving? When will it actually begin? And personally significant, what am *I* going to do?

Every time we move: When will we find a house? What school will Alex attend? What church will we go to? Who will be our new doctor/dentist/vet/hair stylist/car repair shop?

And after each move, more unknowns: When’s our next move? Where are we going next time? The mainland or overseas? Can we stay put a little longer?

And the time we learned that Mark would be deployed to Iraq for fifteen months: Where will he be? Will he be safe? When will he be home for R&R? When will he be home for good?

At this point, we’ve been on this military “adventure” for 16 years. It’s become somewhat easier because I’ve been able to make peace with the unknowns to a degree. I have to accept that I’m not going to know all the details right away, and the only reason I can do that is because everything has always worked out — every single time.

In a sense, I can empathize with the disciples who were sent out into the world totally unprepared for a long journey. They probably felt pretty uneasy about taking off without any possessions. I dare say there must’ve been some serious complaining going on behind Jesus’s back. (That’s what I would’ve done, anyway — not gonna lie.)

But despite their understandable worries about striking out on an indefinite journey with no supplies or money, God provided for them. God took care of them. God put them in situations where others gave them what they needed, took them into their homes, fed them, and kept them safe.

I know God does this with our family. I’ve seen it happen many times. We’ve ended up in the right situations to shape our paths going forward. We’ve found the right doctors who gave us the answers we needed. We’ve crossed paths with people who’ve changed our lives. We found CBC, and we even found our way back. (And we’re so thankful for that!)

When you feel anxious about not knowing something, think back to this Bible passage. The disciples had literally nothing for their journey, yet God met their every need. This is the epitome of faith — a blind trust in God.

Sometimes things work out differently than how we had hoped, but God is always still involved. Keep the faith, friend. God took care of the disciples, God takes care of my little family, and God takes care of you as well.